two pets aren't a good idea
by perspicace
Summary: one cliched stormy night genos frets over his late master. only for saitama to bring back an unwanted guest into the home. genos has never been one to share the spotlight.
1. Chapter 1

Genos looked at the hard water pounding on the cheap kitchen window in wonder. His bionic senses going in overload on the details of the harsh liquid. Each little droplet was an extremity of information and aesthetic. His golden orbs flashed to the clock… _8:30..._ The blonde cyborg set down the same plate he had been scrubbing for over an hour. The abused plate now a good ¼ of an inch less thick. You could still see the texture of the sponge printed on the ceramic. Genos sighed. Saitama was getting to be really really late.

Not that Genos had an actually influence over his master's actions. It just made Genos feel better when his master was home. But Genos convinced himself that it was just for saitama to focus on training. Ya... training. Genos simply wanted saitama to pay attention to...training? He frowned in confusement over his own emotions and enabled his sensors. Scanning the area for what seemed to be the thousandth time, the only life force in the area was some plants. He looked at his phone, he had called his master more times than he had searched the area.

Genos grunted in impatience, whenever Genos knew he was going to rebel against the regular unsaid schedule of the two; he had the nerve to inform saitama of his pre-set actions. But the boy's master has been gone for hours now with no set of words to calm his disciple. It didn't help that the ruthless storm was only fueling the worry of the teen. Genos groaned. A human action he only allowed himself to do by himself. Here he was an S-class hero worrying about a man who could stop a meteorite in a single punch. A man who could make the element around him obey just by the sheer strength of one movement. But here Genos was actually considering the notion of putting his sensei's face on a milk carton.

Just when Genos was about to go out in the rain to search for his master himself- and maybe give the man a lecture (something he had never done)- the jiggling of the lock the blonde cyborgs attention. Finding himself instantaneously excited Genos immediately went to the door. His actions reminded him of a show he had used to see as a child. The cliché that a dog will always wait at the door for its master. Tail wagging erratically. The hormonal teen decided to ignore the similarities. The door opened to reveal a soaking wet hero. The cape of the man looked defeated in how it hung heavily on the floor. Forcing the cheap wood to be enclosed in a puddle of dirty water. Good thing there was no one underneath to suffer from a leak of saitamas drenched clothing.

Saitama looked up at Genos and smiled. The teen's empty chest filled with affection. But just like the teens upper torso, saitama had something in his chest that shouldn't be there. Genos sweat dropped. Because just like some cheesy sci-fi movie there were claws popping out of the older man's shirt. Followed by a movement of the small lump , which elicited a mewl. Saitama laughed. "Would you believe me if I said I have boobs now." Genos frowned, "no sensei... I wouldn't". His vision now glaring a hole into the moving package underneath saitamas yellow suit. So this was the reason his beloved teacher was forced into the impending rain and left Genos pacing the small apartment in worry.

Saitama no longer able to deal with the uncharacteristic anger of his student, shut the door and moved towards the dining room table. Proudly he took out the angry wriggling ball of fur. A perfectly dry specimen now fit like a puzzle piece in the man's palm. Genos had begun to stand behind his master. Toweling off his hairless head. Not really caring about the kitten. "This guy really put up a fight. He's really feisty, for someone I saw floating down the street.'' The blonde cyborg feigned interest, more focused on peeling the tight arms of his masters suit off his body. Before he caught a disease. "oi, quit worrying about stripping me and look at this cuteness."

Genos had to take a second to compose himself. His master had no idea how bad genos really did want to strip the man. Plus Geno's idea of cuteness was valued a lot differently than the angry little cat. Looking down at the now bare chest of his teacher he noticed a contrast between the man's normal perfect skin and the scratched and bloody skin. Saitama with his usual easy going attitude laughed "I have escaped alien invasions unscathed but this little bastard sure did a number on me." Saitama touched the scratched skin, grateful for the cold water that soothed the stinging pain. Genos was gone from behind him and fumbling irritably in a spare cabinet. Something about first aid kit – when you actually need it.

Little did saitama know having a dog and a cat in the apartment could be problematic...

 _To be continued._


	2. Chapter 2

The blank TV screen fluttered to life, flashing on and off from a black screen to static before it finally settled on the colorful vision of a cartoon. Saitama too lazy to deal with his already problematic screen divided to leave it on the channel. It was some children's show about a cat and a dog using elaborate schemes to annoy each other. The usual common comedic-stick of cartoons, to use ridiculous plans to annoy someone else. Even though saitama was a full grown adult he smirked at how the dog hit the cat over the head with a mallet. Making a 'boing' sound effect the cat folded in itself like an accordion and popped back to normal. Even with only being 2% emption he still felt childish joy in watching the two anthromorphic characters squabble.

If only the clueless hero could see the similarity to his real life and the show.

"Che! Damn cat!'' saitama looked up from his flipping the channels and looked at the two. Genos fuming as the kitten bit aggressively to the cyborgs foot. Not that it caused the cyborg any pain, but it still brought a vast amount of annoyance to the once happy teen. The cat had only been living with the two for a week and at each given moment the two managed to get in some sort of conflict. Every opportunity would result in the blonde teen passive-aggressively bringing up why having a cat (specifically this one) wasn't a good idea. Not that saitama ever noticed. Not even when Genos refused to give the cat the leftovers that would've just otherwise been put in the trash.

Attempting to kick it off, the cyborg looked to his master for assistance. Getting up with a huff, the older man picked up the small animal. Who had proceeded to fake injury? He cooed as the cat innocently mewed. Talking as if it were the cats own thoughts saitama apologized "I just wanted to play, that's all." He laughed as the cat pawed his chin. An angry sound like a teapot hit his ears. "Oi, be careful Genos. The little guy has sensitive ears." He pet the soft fur of the kitten. Through clenched teeth Genos apologized. Stomping to the kitchen, Genos did the few dishes in the sink. Even though the living arrangements wear near spotless, Genos still found something to clean after every time an occurrence happened with the cat.

Saitama, not understanding why Genos was purposefully clanging dishes, cradled the kitten to the futon. Now situated in front of the television, he set the little bundle of fur between his legs. Rubbing the belly of the cat, saitama was soon attacked by sharp claws. The cat happily attacking the man's hand. "Ow! Goddamnit ya little shit!" saitama laughed and ruffled the kitten's ears. "You shouldn't touch a cat's belly sensei." Genos said indifferently refusing to look at the sight in back of him. "Well, what am I supposed to do? Scratch yours?" the sensei motioned sarcastically. In embarrassed shock, Genos dropped a plate. Shattering the cheap ceramic across the tiled floor.

"Th-That's not what I-I meant sensei!"

Saitama rolled his eyes and gave an unnoticed smile towards his student. Looking back at the kitten he tried to decide a name for the cat. Not really even knowing the gender of the cat (saitama felt a little uncomfortable by the idea of checking) he thought to give it a genderless name. Taking time to bring in consideration the cats dirty gray coat he thought for a while…"concrete? No that's awful. Hmm... Grey? ugh no.." "How about 'trash" Genos interjected. "Eh?! Don't be ridiculous, he or she needs an awesome name!" Genos deciding to help his sensei out (though he really didn't with this topic) "it's a girl sensei.''

Saitama appreciative of his disciple's information ushered a thank you. Leaving Genos happy with his decision to tell his sensei. Saitama sighed "maybe I'll call you 'fan'." he picked up the cat and nuzzled the cold pink nose of the kitten to his own face. "Like a fangirl. Cause you've been like my only fan.''

The front door slammed loudly with the departure of Genos.

"What the hell's that guy's problem?" saitama said.

Fan' meowed happily.


	3. Chapter 3

The run down bar seemed lively and boisterous. With the yelling of men and sloshing of booze. Which, could be further from the truth. Since the old bar, with the molded over sign (where even the name of the bar wasn't visible) housed two people. Two hammered heroes. A cyclist and a caped baldy. The duo situated in the middle of the ghost bar, bottles surrounding them.

"I just don't know what to do man, he's all tensed up. Damn bastard can't even get along with 'fan when she's just sleeping." saitama looked at his drinking partner. Moment rider, near the brink of unconsciousness, it was quite evident he couldn't hold his liquor the same way an "egg" can. "Why don't you just get rid of one of them..." moment slurred, the words seeping out of him like a burp. Saitama shook his head in defiance, refusing his new friends suggestion. "nah." saitama paused allowing the acidic buildup of booze to settle back down. "I rescued that cat from the rain, it'd be a dick move if I just threw it back out there. Plus it's only a baby." moment rider nodded in drunken agreement. "Just get rid of Genos. Seems like he can't behave." saitama didn't like that option either.

Not using any senses, either than touch, he fished in the near empty bowl of appetizers. With a mouth full of the greasy substance moment remarked "seems like jealousy if you ask Me.'' saitama resting his whole upper bodyweight on his hand he quirked an eyebrow. Not buying whatever nonsense he was told. "You're drunk man." groaning the cyclist fixed his position on the chair. "No dude it makes sense, I remember when I was a kid, and I use to get jealous all the time of my little sister. I even pulled her hair'' saitama asked how the green monster was stopped.

"My ma' just kind of made sure that I knew I was appreciated. Just every time she'd do something for my airs, she kind of made sure to do the same for Me." moment laughed at his pathetic childish story; tilting the beer bottle to his friend he praised his advice. "It's not like they're sibling's man. That's not going to work."

"Ya. But they are pets. Genos will have the same mentality as a kid. I mean he is a dog. So-" saitama cut him off, can't believing he had decided to get advice from the drunk guy. "No no! Genos is a person dude. He's my roommate."

"Really?! But, you made it sound like he was a grouchy old dog." moment laughed. "Hey where are my keys?"

Saitama moaned. "No! Dam nit mummer!" giggling, the man remarked "damn, what late 20-something guy acts like that. You see how I got confused right."

"He's nineteen moment."

"Well THAT'S creepy. Damn pervert." continuing to laugh, moment fell off his chair. Where he proceeded to holler in amusement. Picking up the cycle keys that were right in front of him, he knew that he wasn't going allow the cyclist to get on the wheeled vehicle. Especially with the kind of drunk moment happened to be." saitama looked at his blown up phone and frowned. Even though his vision had begun to become hazy, he still knew they all came from a certain cyborg. "I'll just text him to come pick us up." saitama fumbled with the buttons of his phone, annoyed by how small the letters were "wait... damnit! I don't even know the name of the bar! Sure don't know the address." deciding not to worry his roommate he slung the unconscious drinking partner across his shoulder. Making his way back to the apartment. While in his other hand he dialed Genos.

The sound of a clean quiet environment let saitama know his disciple had answered the phone. Damn, the guy didn't even let the phone get to the second ring. "Master?! Where are you?!'' saitama laughed. "Oi Genos."

"Hai!'' on the other end Genos flung on his sweater, already calculating the whereabouts of his s=teacher. Eager for instruction.

"Moment, say's I have to pet you when I get home. So that's what I'm going to do." the other line was silent. Aside from some weird mechanical noise. It sounded like some form of electrical disturbance

Saitama hung up his phone and hiccupped in drunken ignorance of what he had said. Dragging his load back to the apartment


	4. Chapter 4

Genos frowned at the small animal underneath him, the petite body moving silently around his feet. The kitten taking the time to avoid the ebony shoes, knowing the consequences if it dared scratch the cyborgs feet. The teen sighed, lowering himself to the ground he sat in formal position. Furthering his actions by lowering his head towards the cat, making Genos look as if he was slouching in an uncivilized manner. "Oi... we're going to have to get along now cat." sensing the presence of the teens face, 'fan took it upon herself to finally put a flaw on genos's face. With a hiss came the arrival of a long scratch across the synthetic skin. Of course it didn't cause any form of pain, but Genos was still left with four long scratches parallel to each other. Covering a large portion of his porcelain cheek. "Well. That. Covers. That…" Genos said through clenched teeth, trying his hardest to not make use of his flame equipped weapons. Genos often mused to himself that his sensei wouldn't notice if he were eating charred cat. Although the blonde was quite annoyed by the vexatious cat he had a more pressing matter to deal with.

The phone call he had received from saitama sensei.

Genos was really stressing out over it all. Lifting himself up off of the floor, he left the defensive cat. "Damn spawn of Satan." the cyborg huffed flopping himself on the kitchen chair, continuing to open up the shared laptop that permanently rests on the table. Usually Genos would never use the laptop unless he was given permission by saitama. Who of course would just laugh in disbelief towards genos's unnecessary politeness. typing in the information that was beggining to burn a hole through his brain. something that could still be actjally damaged (because it was the only organic part of him). in an expertly fashion the teen typed , metal fingers on plastic keys ' "definition of pet.." the screen flickered once or twice before the results were shown to him. Of course the intelligent teen knew the answer, he was just secretly hoping it meant something else...

1... verb: stroke or pat (an animal) affectionately.

2: adjective: denoting a thing that one devotes special attention to or feels particularly strongly about.

Genos groaned. Those were exactly what he knew it was going to be, way before he had relied on the mainstream search engine. "This is bad," he sighed. Well, actually that what was the real problem here? None of that sounded like a punishment to him. Especially since saitama said it specifically to the teen, who was a virgin to any form of romantic confrontation. "Yo man, so how'd it go last night with her?" the television show Genos had forgotten to turn off caught his attention. Not moving from his position, Genos strained his neck, taking in view of the two men talking about folic exploits. The other partner in the conversation laughed, not fooling any of the viewers that it was genuine. "Let's just say she gave me a special kind of petting- if you know what I m-" the appliance died quickly when Genos unplugged the cord. Spasmodically flopping himself down on the futon the blonde teen nestled, face deep in the pillow. His heightened robotic senses takin in every scent of saitama. Even though most of it was tainted by the stench of feline.

"Ugggghhhhhhhh!"

Genos was stopped from his tantrum by the arrival his teacher. The jiggling of the lock alerting him of the limited time he had before the door was open... " _3.56 seconds remaining"_ Genos unwillingly bolted himself up from his cocoon of blankets. He dashed across the room. Fixing the sheets, shutting the laptop, putting away the remaining dishes. The door opened. Genos stopped quickly, feigning innocence. 'Fan quickly proceeding to mew excitedly at the arrival of the drunken bald man. Genos pouted. That was his job to greet master saitama. "Ya... ya good kitty." even without performing a scan, Genos still knew his teacher was highly intoxicated. Genos looked at his master, who had was now crunched over petting the kitten. The teen tried his hardest not to throw up at the sight, even if his stomach was doing flips.

"Master you need to-" quickly Genos reached over to help his master up. Silently overjoyed at the prospect that he could actually be of some help to saitama. But he was cut off by the feel of a strong hat circling around him. Bringing him into a one armed bear hug, the face of the teen now laid safely in the crook of saitama's neck. The toned skin hot against genos's face, the more sensitive part of his body. "Ah... who's a good boy?" saitama stroked the trapped teen's blonde locks. Cooing drunkenly. Genos knowing that his struggles would be ineffective (not that he was really trying) was deadly silent. Trying his dandiest not to faint.

"Master please let go... I'm not a dog." Genos pleaded wishing to be free but at the same time never leave this position. "Mm don't want to. Cat's don't hug back." saitama stated matter of fact, almost offended that Genos didn't seem to know that. The older man sat fully down his back resting on the door. Genos, the taller own now in an even more awkward position. Saitama. Genos groaned this was too much for the youth to take. Wiggling his way up he attempted an escape one more time. "no you don't." saitama laughed yanking the weaker cyborg back, now sitting on his lap, the bald man's arms wrapped around Genos stomach. His head now resting on the hard surface of genos's back.

Genos moaned in disbelief, this was the most unique and cruel torture in the world. Embarrassed he had his face in his hands. 'Fan mewed, begging for attention, her small feet pawing the clothed knee of saitama. "Nuhuh! You're just going to have to wait girl, it's the puppy's turn now." saitama incoherently slurred. Nestling further into genos's back as if the metallic surface were as comfortable as a pillow.

Genos repeated to himself over and over again his hands still in the shelter of his hands. Hoping to calm himself before he exploded.

"I am not a dog. Master seems to be an affectionate drunk that's all. I am not a dog. Master seems to be an affectionate drunk that's all. I am not a dog. Master seems to be an affectionate drunk that's all. I am not a dog. Master seems to be an affectionate drunk that's all. I am not a dog. Master seems to be an affectionate drunk that's all. I am not a dog. Master seems to be an affectionate drunk that's all. I am not a dog. Master seems to be an affectionate drunk that's all. I am not a dog. Master seems to be an affectionate drunk that's all."

"20 words or less puppy."

To be continued


End file.
